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Children's school anxiety

One of our listeners got in touch looking for help with her child's anxiety, she didn’t want to come on air but here is her email:   Hi Ciara   I hope you can help – my 8 year old boy is very anxious about school. He’s in 2nd class and has been like this since leaving senior infants, maybe a little when starting 1st class too.  I suppose he’s always been a little anxious (he started school at 5), but it feels like it’s escalated recently. We moved house the year before he finished Senior Infants, but we didn’t move far away and he seemed to take it well.   His school are quite supportive and he’s got a good teacher who’s trying her best, but it’s a big class and I’m aware she’s under pressure.  He often refuses to go altogether, saying he’s worried about leaving me and Dad incase something happens, or saying he’s worried he won’t do his school work well & people will think he’s stupid.  He never sleeps on Sundays saying worrying about school keeps him awake. He seems calmer when he isn’t in school but is still a little worrier and always has been.     There’s a couple of boys he’s friendly with and sits beside according to his teacher.  She thinks he’s doing ok, but he doesn’t find it easy to make friends. We’ve tried to get him to join the local soccer or GAA team but he says he doesn’t want to, same goes for holiday camps. I don’t know if we should just make him go and hope he builds some resilience & thereby lessen his anxiety, or if we should try and find different hobbies he might like.  He’s such a good kid but definitely has anxious tendencies and school seems to bring this out so much more.    I’m embarrassed to admit that occasionally when he’s very distressed and tired I’ve let him stay home but I know that’s not the answer. Returning to school yesterday after the mid-term was so stressful that I felt I had to write this email – have any of your listeners had a similar situation?  Do you have advice or tips on how to deal with this? Might he just grow out of it? Is it time to visit an expert? (I don’t want him to think there is something wrong with him)  Thanks, anxious Mum  Listeners whose children experienced school anxiety contacted us and explained how they managed it? see more